Pain is not an attractive condition. I had to know. I had to know as best as a reader can, what happened in the aftermath. A suicide is a kind of bomb and after the explosion, there is a lot of smoke and debris. Choking smoke and the kind of debris that caused others to stumble. To fall. To be left trying to find their way again. Back to where they were before.parcelcheck.co.za/ffchen-werden-die-laeuse-los-monkeys.php
Whisper My Secret: A Memoir
But that is not possible and the author shows us that. What I found within was an incredible journey. A journey of loss, love, horror, unrelenting anguish and the prolonged torture of a loving, caring, intelligent and fine human being and the family around her which she loved. Mazzotta has much to be proud of with this book. Not only is it finely crafted, intelligent writing, it is generously peppered with dashes of well chosen colors.
Some warm, some dark, some vibrant and some verging on the kind of hues one might expect only during a nightmare. A nightmare and a monster that does not dissolve simply because you have awakened. We are lead thru this nightmare by the object of the monster's most ferocious attacks, a mother. Only to have all her years of doing so savagely and monstrously brutalized by the suicide of her son, her baby, her "Danny". Yet, amazingly, out of this unrelenting sorrow, self-recrimination, loathing and hopelessness comes the gift of a light. At first just a glimmer.
Then a twinkling. Then, as seen through the eyes and words of the author in this starkly honest account, a steady flame: A flame that burns and illuminates at the same time. Joanne Mazzotta has provided an invaluable service to her readers. Those who have suffered a loss such as hers and those who have not. None of us knows what lies in wait just around the corner. Others are now dealing with the wreckage. In the end she understands that she has not "lost" anything. And she cannot go back to how things used to be. But Danny is still her son. Her baby. And everything in between. What she holds in her heart.
It is herself and her family that have changed.
That have grown. As if in a cauldron. They had too. No one wants to grow because of something like what happened to her and her family. The choice is a stark one. One can fall or one can rise. Rise again and greet the new day with joy and wonder and yet be forever changed.
As impossible as at times that might seem to be, Joanne Mazzotta, through her unrelenting honesty and forbearing, bravely holds a light to show us the way. Joanne is my Aunt, and I am so proud to say that. Unfortunately, I've only seen her and that part of my family a handful of times, but after reading this book I felt so close to them. Especially Joanne. If you want to read a book with a beautiful story, learn about different ways people go through grief, and learn about the strength of a family, read this book. Then read it again. And again. Jul 26, Jeff Dawson rated it really liked it.
It's not your fault. The title says it all. The word suicide for many is a topic of "TABU. If it does, we seldom discuss it.
Is it because we feel fault lies with the family members, or maybe we don't want face to our own demons? When someone we know dies, our friends offer condolences and insist we call if we need anything, the whole time hoping we won't call. I know, I went through my own demons twenty years ago and It's not your fault.
Why Whisper?: A Memoir: Joanne Mazzotta: wejisamy.tk: Panworld Global
I know, I went through my own demons twenty years ago and also watched my daughter's husband take his life in What do we tell them? How do we help them through the pain. How do we relate? Joanne does an excellent job of answering all of those questions as she searches for her own answers on why her son Danny decided it was better to die than live out his life. How would we, as a parent accept one of our children taking their own lives? We could somewhat understand a terrible accident or sudden illness taking a child, but for them to take their own life? Joanne was very fortunate to have a man who would stand behind her through thick and thin.
Joe, her second husband loved her unconditionally. He never wavered from her side. No matter how dark her depression of how withdrawn and angry she became, Joe knew exactly what to say and not to say. He never blamed Danny for his life choices, he accepted them as did his mother. He never lashed out or told his bride "it was the best for everyone," instead he stood by her side waiting for her return. I tip my hat to Joe. Lessor men would have moved on saying, "not my child, not my problem. The hardest question we always ask when a loved departs before their time is "Why"?
Maybe this book will help you with the healing and soul searching.
It isn't your fault. Jul 08, Pearl Barley rated it it was amazing. This story grabbed me from the first page and pulled me in. It's not my usual type of read but the blurb moved me so much I had to find out more. I have only just started it and I have cried and laughed in turn at the bravery of a mother who has lost her child in one of the most tragic ways known to man. What's more I feel as though I'm in her shoes as I read. That is the sign of a very good writer. I will post a lengthier review when I've finished it.
Pass the Kleenex! Dec 16, Dave D'aguanno rated it it was amazing. Personally, I've had my own share of woe-is-me moments, but I've been lucky in not ever having to deal with the suicide of a family member, not to mention the harrowing events that would lead up to it.
In reading this book, one cannot help but compare to some extent what Joanne went through to what anyone has been through who has suffered the loss of a loved one. After all, if we were put here by God or a Higher Power to love and bond with one another, then why are the ones we love taken away from us, often in ways that we can't understand or couldn't prevent even if we wanted to?
To enumerate all the passages in this book that emerge as profoundly moving, even gut-wrenching, would take up far too much space than what is allowed in a review here on Amazon, but I would like to mention that one of the most heartbreaking episodes, in my opinion, takes place in the last third of the book where the younger son Richie, seeing what his mother is going through even before the suicide of his older brother and having gone through a good deal of anguish and suffering of his own, asks her in essence : "What about me?
To be sure, this work has its brighter moments, and there are numerous scenes in which we see how fun-loving and gregarious Danny could be while he was alive, and how he genuinely cared for those around him, all of which would appear to make his decision to commit suicide all the more incomprehensible. In conclusion, let me state that I heartily recommend this book to anyone who may honestly be searching for ways to cope with their grief, or simply with an honest desire to understand why we are all here and how we can deal with the loss of a person who touched our lives deeply.
Mar 06, Doug DePew rated it it was amazing. I bought this book months ago as a resource to deal with serious grief problems I was having. Since that time, I've gotten to know Joanne Mazzotta through social media and consider her a friend. She is a lovely woman with a delightful sense of humor and a deep wisdom. Joanne is an old soul. I didn't have the courage to read this book until a week ago. It sat on my Kindle, and I'd pass it by each time I selected a new book. I always thought,"Not yet.
This I bought this book months ago as a resource to deal with serious grief problems I was having. This book is a tremendous resource not just for survivors of suicide but for anyone dealing with grief. I felt many of the same emotions expressed by Joanne. I cried at points reading her story. Sometimes, I would wake my wife so I could read her a portion of it as I stayed up late at night unable to turn off my Kindle.
I got to know her beloved Danny. I travelled through a large portion of her life and truly felt like all of Joanne's children and weebles were my friends. I was shocked at the utter honesty at points. Nothing is hidden from the reader which is the main point of whole thing. Why whisper? It is a gripping story. Yet Joanne is just a regular woman. But for the grace of God, this could be any of us. Joanne just had the courage to tell her story. This is such an honest look at suicide, death, family, religion, and what's important that I recommend it to anyone. It's worth reading. I've read many other books about grief but none quite like this one.
Most are more like a "how to" manual.
Joanne's is a journey through a real life. If you have yet to experience grief that rocks you to your soul, consider yourself lucky. We all will at some point. This story will show you that you're not alone. Thank you, Joanne. Dec 30, Wendy rated it it was amazing. This book wasn't just about suicide. It helped me realize the hidden anger I have with my own mother and her failed attempt at sobriety.
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