Trust Me Im A Toddler


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Parents have a significant role in how their children develop trust. We have the opportunity to really start our children off with a full trust tank. Trust is generally defined as a positive belief in the good within people and the world. How trust develops as a child grows is based on a concept called positive core beliefs. I explain more about those and their opposing negative beliefs in this post.

Those interpretations are influenced the most by how adults interact with us early in life. In order to foster the development of the positive core beliefs that grow trust, keep these eight actions in mind:. Listening is different than hearing—listening is an action. To listen to a child means to recognize their words, but more importantly to seek to really understand his or her underlying message. We can show children we are listening by paraphrasing their words back to them, staying focused on feeling words.

You, too? The positive core belief growing here is PCB : My parent hears me.


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Speaking up is important. It is knowing that a melting-down child, for example, really needs to sleep so instead of unleashing punishments for lashing out, your focus in on calming your child , and figuring out a way to get him or her horizontal. When speaking to a child, get down and gently look into his or her eyes. Let your child see what sincerity looks like. Children will automatically verbally or nonverbally ask for help , as long as they believe trust those pleas will be answered.

Also respond to emotional statements with validation and support. PCB: Speaking up works—people will help me. Feelings are normal and not too scary. When I am overwhelmed, I can ask for help. Follow through with what you tell your child you will be doing. Be reliable. Get in the habit of not using white lies with your children.

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This helps children match verbal and nonverbal communication, reducing confusion. It also helps little ones understand what positive moral ethics are. You might be wondering how this affects trust—it actually does quite a bit. When a child can trust things happen in a certain order, the brain can relax, staying out of fight-or-flight mode.


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Routines and consistency also help reduce conflict, as the child will get to futility quicker. When this song is over, it is time for us to put our boots on. When we feel we are being treated fairly, we can let our guard down. The setting and holding of boundaries grows a slightly different type of trust: a strong belief that a parent will uphold safety and integrity. Let go of the guilt and embrace the fact that parenting isn't about documenting every moment perfectly.

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10 Common Mistakes Parents Today Make (Me Included)

To say that I've had a hard time with breastfeeding would be an understatement. I truly believed that it would be so much easier with my second child — at least that's what everyone kept telling me. But I have a medical condition called insufficient growth tissue IGT that prevents me from making enough milk to feed my baby. Despite all of my efforts, breastfeeding did not get easier the second time around.

Even though my condition is rare, many women do struggle with nursing their second children. So go easy on yourself and only do what brings you joy. I'm not talking about eating in the car, I'm talking about eating the food they find in the seat of the car. Cheerios, fruit snacks, crackers, you name it, my kids have eaten plenty of crumbled-up leftovers found shoved in their car seat — something that would have sent my anxiety into overdrive when it was just my daughter.

But when hunger strikes — and you still haven't figured out how to pack for two — somehow all food is fair game. If you spend any time on social media, you might get the idea that being a parent destroys your life. Some of the posts make it out to be this never-ending disaster. Time with friends and extended family becomes even more important the second time around. Not only will you benefit from a few extra hands, the support you get from your village is priceless. When you have kids, everyone says, "Get ready to forget about time alone with your partner. Of course, you will have two kids vying for every ounce of energy you have, but it's still important to invest in your relationship.

And trust me, you will be so thankful that you carve out time for this — even if they have to join you in the laundry room. For a long time, I was convinced that all of my parenting mishaps were going to lead to my kids being mad at me forever. But here's the thing about kids: They're a bit like rubber bands. When you stretch them just a little, they do snap back. As long as you don't stretch too hard, they will learn and benefit from the mistakes you make.

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So, relax and don't be so hard on yourself. Kids do forgive and forget. I was worried that having two kids close together in age was going to make my house a war zone. But what I discovered was the exact opposite. Even at two years old, my daughter took to her baby brother in a way that I wasn't expecting.

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Sure, they've had some minor blow-outs along the way — they are 10 and 8, after all — but I had no idea how much they would love each other, and it fills my heart. World globe An icon of the world globe, indicating different international options. Search icon A magnifying glass. It indicates, "Click to perform a search". Close icon Two crossed lines that form an 'X'. It indicates a way to close an interaction, or dismiss a notification.

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